So my Son is 8 years old and playing in competitive soccer. I will be the first to admit that on his team of 9 he probably ranks 6th or 7th. Maybe 5th on a good day. He is disciplined, works hard, knows his game but is just one of the slower kids and not the strongest shooter. Usually plays Left or Right Back.
The Coach has had a tendency to play him less than the others and generally I am okay with that because at times he plays quite a bit. Then some things happened and I am not real sure how to approach it.
In a tournament we won our first 2 games and were an automatic lock for the finals. The 3rd game literally meant absolutely nothing. My Son's Coach decided to play the "best players" into the ground and my Son got to play all of 10 minutes of a 50 minute game in a game that meant literally nothing. I was pissed but said nothing.
Then tonight at practice the Coach handed out MVP Pins to 5 of of the 8 kids that were there and one to a kid who was practicing with us but not on our team. He said they "tried hard" the last game. The irony is my Son played most of the last game and more than just about anyone else, and one of the kids that didn't get a pin had 2 goals. So the "they tried hard" crap doesn't seem to make sense.
I thought that was a pretty shitty way to handle that situation as we had 2 subs that game, it was very hot and all the kids played their ass off and we won 7-1.
Our Coach is 22, and it's his first year coaching a team. I try to keep that in mind. I also have to keep in mind that if I piss him off he could plant my Son on the bench the rest of the season. Also with tryouts for next season coming up in a couple of weeks, I'd hate to do something to jeopardize my Son.
On the other hand, I see it as I am paying good $'s to play in this league and a dick move is a dick move.
The day BEFORE your kid is now totally embarrassed, ashamed and ostracized because his parents whined to the coach that "you aren't playing my kid enough". [Reply]
Originally Posted by petegz28:
So my Son is 8 years old and playing in competitive soccer. I will be the first to admit that on his team of 9 he probably ranks 6th or 7th. Maybe 5th on a good day. He is disciplined, works hard, knows his game but is just one of the slower kids and not the strongest shooter. Usually plays Left or Right Back.
The Coach has had a tendency to play him less than the others and generally I am okay with that because at times he plays quite a bit. Then some things happened and I am not real sure how to approach it.
In a tournament we won our first 2 games and were an automatic lock for the finals. The 3rd game literally meant absolutely nothing. My Son's Coach decided to play the "best players" into the ground and my Son got to play all of 10 minutes of a 50 minute game in a game that meant literally nothing. I was pissed but said nothing.
Then tonight at practice the Coach handed out MVP Pins to 5 of of the 8 kids that were there and one to a kid who was practicing with us but not on our team. He said they "tried hard" the last game. The irony is my Son played most of the last game and more than just about anyone else, and one of the kids that didn't get a pin had 2 goals. So the "they tried hard" crap doesn't seem to make sense.
I thought that was a pretty shitty way to handle that situation as we had 2 subs that game, it was very hot and all the kids played their ass off and we won 7-1.
Our Coach is 22, and it's his first year coaching a team. I try to keep that in mind. I also have to keep in mind that if I piss him off he could plant my Son on the bench the rest of the season. Also with tryouts for next season coming up in a couple of weeks, I'd hate to do something to jeopardize my Son.
On the other hand, I see it as I am paying good $'s to play in this league and a dick move is a dick move.
Anyone else been in a similar situation?
My son was on a football team when he was 2nd/3rd grade. The league actually had a rule that the kids were guaranteed at least 6 plays per game. You could tell that the coach didn't mind letting the lesser players (like my son) play when the team was winning handily. Then we got into games that were close.
One game, it was getting toward the end and my son had only gotten like 2 STs plays the whole entire game. I knew that there was most likely not enough time for my son to get his plays in so I just started letting the coach have it. The jackhole tried to say that my son had gotten his plays but I knew that was not true.
For all of those that want to make negative comments, think about this. My son worked his butt off. He was at practice every day when even some of the star players weren't. He worked his butt off every practice. This was not a high school team that you try out for; it was a league set up specifically, with the guaranteed 6 plays, to at least let the lesser players get a chance to play in games. But then you get coaches like this douche that didn't care. He wanted to win no matter the cost. People like that don't deserve to be coaches, IMO.
All that being said, pete's situation may be different. :-) [Reply]
Originally Posted by petegz28:
I generally don't want to get involved but when you see your kid getting discouraged because of dick moves it's hard to stay silent.
I tell my Son to use it as fuel to get better but still wanna tell the Coach he is being a douche to the kids.
Seems like you're piling on and whining. You know your son isn't the best. Mad because the coach won't give him playing time and mad he didn't get a trophy and other players did.
All true characteristics of a Karen. All of this could be avoided causing you to vent by just simply asking the coach, what your kid needs to work on to get better (that starts the conversation). Instead, you say nothing cause you don't want to "rock the boat" for your kid going forward.
Newflash... The organization/other coaches knows your kid. The sooner you speak up, the more answers you'll get and you'll be able to set your expectations. Just going in every year hoping things get better by winging it, is the same thing as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Either move him down to get more playing time til he develops or ask the coach some questions. Sounds like it can't get any worse.
It's simple: Make shit happen for him and stop putting things in others hands. [Reply]
Originally Posted by kcclone:
I wasn’t directing that at you, as much as the youth parent complainer in general.
And my experience is more on the daddy coach side. Paying a coach is a different matter.
I coached all 3 of my kids soccer teams and also coached my son's basketball teams. One or two of the soccer parents were jerks. They complained about practices and other things like that. Hey, if you don't like it, you could have chosen to coach. I dedicated my time to do that because they needed coaches and I volunteered to help. The first time I did it, I had no clue what I was doing. But I learned things over the years. [Reply]
Originally Posted by Vladimir_Kyrilytch:
OP, you dont need to capitalize "Son". Unless youre talking about the Son of Man, Jesus Christ himself. "son" is fine.
Maybe Son is what Pete named his son. Seems like a good idea and it would keep Pete from getting confused. [Reply]
My 8 yr old plays on a girls basketball team. These girls are mostly in their 2nd year (3rd session) and are still struggling to dribble in traffic, find an open teammate and/or get a shot off without having to slow down so much they get stuffed.
So what's he spend 45 minutes doing? Teaching them to embellish a charge. Mind you, he doesn't teach them how to TAKE a charge (my daughter thought mere contact got the charging foul). He doesn't teach them what a charge is. He just has them get in a line and then come out to 'play defense' and when he'd bump them with a forearm they'd throw themselves to the ground.
I left the stands when my daughter was on the baseline and said "we'll talk about this at home, I'll teach you what a charge is and how to earn one, but if I see you flopping when someone brushes you out there, I'll come on the court and take you off it..."
So her coach comes over to me to discuss interrupting practice or whatever - pft. I didn't walk in the middle of the huddle and I didn't shout so the other girls could hear. I wasn't even on the court; she was at the baseline. I repeated exactly what I told her and said that he's here to teach these girls the fundamentals of the game at this age. He's here to teach them how to play the game the right way. He's NOT here to teach a bunch of girls who can't dribble with their off-hand how to work the refs.
Had he not come up to me, I wouldn't have said anything to him about it. But that's piss-poor coaching, IMO. I've coached youth baseball/t-ball and soccer and I'm pretty much impossible to rattle so it's not like I haven't spoken w/ parents in the past. I get that nobody wants to be undermined. But I wasn't going to have my daughter walking out of there thinking that being a european soccer pussy was the way to play a game that she certainly won't be playing past 12 yrs old. [Reply]
