Screw that, I pictured her working that thing over my... well, let's just say, have you ever seen a giraffe eat something? :-)

I'm so old. I can't believe that people somewhere are just now leaving to go out

I got a blackberry for work and am posting from it. WoooHooooo!
Posted via Mobile Device

Don't worry, the boss will never know.

I got you beat. I spent the night eating heat-your-own pizza and playing cards with 80-year olds.

Missed a prime opportunity for some nookie. Until you've had a gumjob, you've never lived. :-)

What's sad is that I scurried back to my cousin's to get on my webcam and chat with a girl in Texas...who then informed me she was going to a bachelorette party.

Pathetic.

In the new DirectTV ad with the Black Eyed Peas, Fergie looks smoking hot. I'd f**k her, even if she does pee her pants. Actually, I'd f**k her AS she pees her pants. :-)

:-):-)

Are you R. Kelly?

I thought he liked underage girls.

Well, 5 year olds have a higher likelihood of peeing their pants, right?

Well that too, but he has a particular affection for urine in the bedroom.

:-)

Welp, time to nerd out again.

http://www.starwarsinconcert.com/