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Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and
The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review
The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
Hammock Parties 02:55 PM 11-20-2012
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE OVERTHROW!!!!


[Reply]
Hammock Parties 02:59 PM 11-20-2012
yes yes matt you stud


[Reply]
Fish 03:33 PM 11-20-2012
Originally Posted by BossChief:
total dumbass.
Needs more weapons around him....
[Reply]
Dayze 04:22 PM 11-20-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Could be our last Cassel GIF. Enjoy.

a fitting end.
that was awesome.

and holy shit to that overthrow; jfc.
[Reply]
TLO 05:00 PM 11-20-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE NOW I CAN'T HANDOFF I SUCK HARD

:-):-):-)
[Reply]
Rausch 05:06 PM 11-20-2012
We were both right.

High five in the shadow of failure...
[Reply]
Sweet Daddy Hate 10:16 AM 11-22-2012
Better O-line needed/TF Dumbass
[Reply]
Three7s 10:59 AM 11-22-2012
Hey, on the overthrow, at least he looked through his progressions!

On another note, I was just watching NFL Network and they were basically roasting the crew about previous predictions. It went to Kurt Warner who stated that Cassel would be the best QB in the rest. Needless to say, everyone got a laugh out of that one.
[Reply]
Phobia 11:16 AM 11-22-2012
Yeah. That was hilarious. Poor Warner.
[Reply]
Sweet Daddy Hate 11:20 AM 11-22-2012
No one saw Cassel's FAIL coming. No, not even me...

-Count Zarth Face-
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 11:49 AM 11-27-2012
NO MATT, YOU DON'T GET A WEEK OFF.

Complete and total gutting of our QB by BJ Kissel in this video. Just spectacular.


[Reply]
Hammock Parties 09:58 PM 11-27-2012
The words. Eat them.


[Reply]
NJChiefsFan 10:04 PM 11-27-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE OVERTHROW!!!!

I laughed really fucking hard when this happened.
[Reply]
New World Order 11:07 PM 11-27-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Could be our last Cassel GIF. Enjoy.




This was right before the fg that made it 21-6 at half, hell of a job cassel.
[Reply]
Dayze 11:33 PM 11-27-2012
oh, my bad. my bad. sorry guys. that's my bad
[Reply]
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