I'm very dehydrated.
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Midday update: explosive flatulence results in nightcrawler-sized offal.
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I believe in the power of blueberries. I was clogged up for days and ate blueberry pancakes at the local diner. First time in my life I shit so much my shit was past the water line a good 2 inches. It was a geographical phenomenon, like a newly discovered island in the ocean built from the depths of active volcanos.
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prune juice? I have exactly 2:24 to drink then get to the bathroom.
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How many courics?
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Afternoon update: Almost entirely without warning, a fecal slurry ejects itself from my rectum. I now must treat every quiver of my lower intestine as a possible warning sign of explosive diarrhea. Htismaqe officially added to my list of "People to Kill."

Side note: I haven't shat thrice in one day in a long time.
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First of all, it worked, did it not?

Second of all, I warned you!
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:-)
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I'm kidding, of course.

I wish I had a scale. I feel tremendously light.
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You're welcome! :-)
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I told you. I knew it would come to this but no. Couldn't listen to me. Now you'll forever be plagued by the question of just how much did you shit. Sure, you'll talk about the time you took an epic dump but you'll never be able to quantify it.
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And we didn't even get a picture of it
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?

yeah we did
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Really? Glad I missed that post
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taco bell usually does it for me
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