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Hall of Classics>I F*cking HATE Golf !!!!....
WilliamTheIrish 07:45 PM 09-16-2004
.. That's right. F*ck you Golf. You piece of Shiot-sucking game. **** you again, I say.

And F8ck the goat sodomizing bastard Scotsman who invented the miserable game. If I see that (pinkie pulling) mother f@cker in heaven I'll beat his f@cking brains in. Course if he invented golf, that means he played golf and every golfer by definition is cheater and a liar therefore he's probably in hell... WHERE HE ****ING BELONGS!! for inventing this terminally f@cked, terminally frustrating, hypertension causing game.

**** HIM!!!!

Oh and to my golf clubs... **** YOU you dirty no good (pinkie pullers) See if I ever take you useless bastards anywhere nice again. You all deserve to be melted down and turned into f*cking bicycle spokes. That's right!!! Do you hear me? F*cking bicycle spokes!!!!! You bastards let me down today. You embarrassed me. Absolutely embarrassed me.

Don't look at me like that. You MF'ers did all that shiot on purpose and you ****ling know it!!! Especially you 5-Iron. Don't act like you didn't deserve that 75 foot helicopter ride down the cart path after you intentionally scuffed that tee shot on the par 3. You just sat there laughing as my ball skipped like a f@cking flat rock before it settled to the bottom of that lake. You're lucky I didn't throw you in front of a speeding semi-trailer. So F@CK YOU!!!!!

Don't look so upset 7-Iron. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You did your job. From 140 - 160 you were dead on. I want you to know I'm not taking this out on you. You still have a home.

As for you pitching wedge. Just what f*cking good are you? You think it's funny? Huh? Do ya? You little SOB. Don't make me come over there and bash you into the ground again you useless hunk of f*cking pot metal. Smacking balls over the green today. Just to p!ss me off. WTF did I ever do to you? I bought you. Put a f@cking roof over your head. Clean you religiously. Keep the dirt and grime off you. Give you a nice cover so you don't get hurt by the other clubs when bouncing around in the cart and cause a dent. This is how you repay my kindness? By blasting shots OVER the f*cking green from 20, 30, 40, 15 yards away? Listen real close mother f*cking pitching wedge. If you ever, ever pull a stunt like that again I will get the hacksaw out and slice you up like a Thanksgiving turkey. But I'll do it slow. Real f*cking slow. And I'll video tape the whole mother f*cking thing. Yep. And I'll show it to all the other clubs in the bag. Just to let them know I' will not tolerate this type of play.

DO YOU F*CKING HEAR ME???????

I hope so because if this ever happens again, I will encase you mother f*ckers in concrete and sink you to the bottom of the mother f*cking ocean. The Feds will find Hoffa before they'll find you f*ckers.

Is that clear?

**** this game. I'm going to bed.
[Reply]
|Zach| 07:47 PM 09-16-2004
Are you sure you aren't a member of the Blue Springs Country Club?

Want another Absolute and Cranberry?
[Reply]
Phobia 07:47 PM 09-16-2004
I'm going to cut and paste this post Saturday afternoon after my first round in 6 months.
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ROYC75 07:48 PM 09-16-2004
So , do you want to play golf with us on Monday, Sept. 27 th ?
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WilliamTheIrish 07:48 PM 09-16-2004
Goddammit!!! ****. Shit.
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ROYC75 07:49 PM 09-16-2004
We could use a good laugh that day, Oh come on now, it's not that bad .
[Reply]
WilliamTheIrish 07:49 PM 09-16-2004
Originally Posted by ROYC75:
So , do you want to play golf with us on Monday, Sept. 27 th ?

I'm in like mother ****er.... wait'll you see my new 90 angle clubs... :-)
[Reply]
Bowser 07:50 PM 09-16-2004
What was the question?
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WilliamTheIrish 07:51 PM 09-16-2004
Cleansing breath... (calm blue ocean.. calm blue ocean... calm blue ocean...)
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Bowser 07:51 PM 09-16-2004
Originally Posted by ZachKC:
Are you sure you aren't a member of the Blue Springs Country Club?

Want another Absolute and Cranberry?
No Zach, gawddammit, you put their drinks on my bill when I tell you that's what I want!

Where's my beer??
[Reply]
Hydrae 07:51 PM 09-16-2004
:-) Great rant!
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ROYC75 07:52 PM 09-16-2004
We can advertise the comedy act , let you be the star of the show. Hey think about it, another fundraiser.
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WilliamTheIrish 07:52 PM 09-16-2004
They're still looking at me... and laughing... I;m going to go mash another club...
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WilliamTheIrish 07:53 PM 09-16-2004
Originally Posted by ROYC75:
We can advertise the comedy act , let you be the star of the show. Hey think aboit it, another fundraiser.
I'd don't think the foundation would be invited back if I went "Manson" on their course.
[Reply]
FloridaChief 07:54 PM 09-16-2004
Originally Posted by :
Oh and to my golf clubs... **** YOU you dirty no good (pinkie pullers)
WTF kind of an insult is pinky-puller? Is it worse than being a Chorfs fan?
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