ChiefsPlanet Mobile
Page 11 of 24
« First < 7891011 1213141521 > Last »
Hall of Classics>I'm on a mission to shit
Hammock Parties 11:46 AM 05-19-2014
Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 04:45 PM 05-19-2014
USUL HAS CALLED A BIG ONE


[Reply]
booger 04:47 PM 05-19-2014
Man up a push that sucker out sugar tits!
[Reply]
OnTheWarpath15 04:48 PM 05-19-2014
I'm not sure why I keep checking this thread - I'm genuinely concerned I'm going to scroll down and see a pic of a bowl so full it's drydocked.
[Reply]
Rams Fan 04:50 PM 05-19-2014
Do you have a large collection of magazines to read while thy almighty shit is passed?
[Reply]
bevischief 04:50 PM 05-19-2014
Originally Posted by Count Zarth:
USUL HAS CALLED A BIG ONE

:-):-)
[Reply]
Pasta Giant Meatball 04:55 PM 05-19-2014
A midget came out of his arse!!!
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 05:00 PM 05-19-2014
nope, just a spice dream
[Reply]
Holladay 05:00 PM 05-19-2014
I wouldn't want to be around when he blows/pops. I would suggest to go to a public restroom. It's gonna sound like you dropped a watermelon in the toilet. Also, you don't have to clean up the mess:-)
[Reply]
RealSNR 05:01 PM 05-19-2014
Originally Posted by Buck:
Miralax
Yep
[Reply]
RealSNR 05:06 PM 05-19-2014

[Reply]
htismaqe 05:07 PM 05-19-2014
Originally Posted by SNR:
Yep
No!

Miralax might make it worse. At the very least, it takes 2-3 days to work.

Never fear though, he drank an entire bottle of magnesium citrate. This will all be over shortly.
[Reply]
booger 05:08 PM 05-19-2014
That thing is really gonna stretch your star fish
[Reply]
Chief Pote 05:11 PM 05-19-2014
I call bullshit. I had to drink a gallon of that lemony shit, 30 minutes tops and you're shitting your pants.
[Reply]
htismaqe 05:13 PM 05-19-2014
Originally Posted by ChiefButthurt:
I call bullshit. I had to drink a gallon of that lemony shit, 30 minutes tops and you're shitting your pants.
It could take up to 2 hours.
[Reply]
SAUTO 05:15 PM 05-19-2014
Originally Posted by htismaqe:
No!

Miralax might make it worse. At the very least, it takes 2-3 days to work.

Never fear though, he drank an entire bottle of magnesium citrate. This will all be over shortly.
My daughter takes miralax and shits very soon afterward.


It works or her like a champ
Posted via Mobile Device
[Reply]
Page 11 of 24
« First < 7891011 1213141521 > Last »
Up