My favorite dumping spot used to be the Macy's at Independence Center. Surprised to hear about Kohl's. I would say the worst has to be Barnes & Noble. [Reply]
Originally Posted by lewdog:
My best shit story was getting sick at the Native American Museum, on a buffalo burger, while touring DC.
It hit me later that day at the Holocaust museum and I was blowing out that bathroom like you can't believe! This quiet and humble place and I was just ripping that bathroom apart with tons of other people in it.
YES, for the WIN! Do it in front of others in the room so they UNDERSTAND the wraith that is taking place in their presence! :-) Someone was having a Holocaust of their own. Those patrons UNDERSTAND now what the Holocaust experience was - they lived it through you my brother! Great job! :-)
Of course I do not think ANYTHING regarding the Holocaust is humorous by any means - this is merely a funny side thought. [Reply]
Do people really use ass gaskets anymore? I just find the cleanest stall, grab a handful of clean TP and do a quick wipe of the seat and then plant my ass and go. If I am taking a dump in a public restroom, it likely isn’t for a leisure rest but rather an emergent situation. [Reply]
Originally Posted by Stryker:
YES, for the WIN! Do it in front of others in the room so they UNDERSTAND the wraith that is taking place in their presence! :-) Someone was having a Holocaust of their own. Those patrons UNDERSTAND now what the Holocaust experience was - they lived it through you my brother! Great job! :-)
Of course I do not think ANYTHING regarding the Holocaust is humorous by any means - this is merely a funny side thought.
My favorite go-to poop spots are the nice hotels or golf country clubs all over Scottsdale.
Once I even had a nice free breakfast at an upscale hotel as the conference room next to the shitter had cleared out but the cleaning service hadn't come to clear the chaffing and service dishes.
Just pulled out a seat at a clean table and had myself fresh squeezed OJ, sausages, bacon, pancakes, fresh fruit, cheese and cold cuts, fresh coffee, toast, muffins. All fresh and no one left to eat but me! :-)
The company that had the space and breakfast just left for their business trip. LOL [Reply]
I took the most perfectly elegant, double tapered shit last night. Just a one turder with very little cleanup involved. I was so pleased with it. Then as I was about to stand up, I felt a rumble and it was like Typhoon Haiyan and the eruption of Mount Tambora all at once. I think I lost 8 pounds. Its too bad I wasn't at Kohls for it. [Reply]
Originally Posted by Mosbonian:
Think it's bad at 40? Wait until you are 60 ..
I'm waiting for someone to tell a story of standing up to pee at a Urinal only to realize it's not a fart that accompanied your need to take a pee.
Time to tell the story...
The only 2 places while on the road that I trust to use the bathroom is Buccee's and Cracker Barrel. This one occurred at a Cracker Barrel in TN.
We had been traveling all morning and breakfast was rumbling in my stomach and was letting me know it was just about exit time. It was near lunch time so the family all agreed on CB for lunch.
The family got seated and I headed to the bathroom and found an open and clean stall. I had just proceeded to drop a load and I hear a guy come in with his kid. The son went one urinal and dad to the other. Right in the middle of taking a leak the Dad let out a fart that left no doubt he should have gone to the other stall. It was hard enough to stifle my laugh as it was but when the kid said "eww Dad I think you crapped your pants!"
There was no way to stifle a laugh after that. I finished wiping, pulled up my pants and got out of the stall...making sure not to make any eye contact. I washed my hands as the dad instructed the son to go tell his Mom to get him a change of clothes and for him to bring them back.
I headed out into the general waiting area trying to work my way to the dining area. As luck would have it I was blocked by the boy who was trying to whisper to his mom about what he needed. The mom in exasperation told the boy to speak up.And true to child like manner he speaks up in a loud voice "Dad crapped his pants in the bathroom and needs new clothes ".
I've never seen someone turn so red and exit the building so fast.
Originally Posted by Mosbonian:
Time to tell the story...
The only 2 places while on the road that I trust to use the bathroom is Buccee's and Cracker Barrel. This one occurred at a Cracker Barrel in TN.
We had been traveling all morning and breakfast was rumbling in my stomach and was letting me know it was just about exit time. It was near lunch time so the family all agreed on CB for lunch.
The family got seated and I headed to the bathroom and found an open and clean stall. I had just proceeded to drop a load and I hear a guy come in with his kid. The son went one urinal and dad to the other. Right in the middle of taking a leak the Dad let out a fart that left no doubt he should have gone to the other stall. It was hard enough to stifle my laugh as it was but when the kid said "eww Dad I think you crapped your pants!"
There was no way to stifle a laugh after that. I finished wiping, pulled up my pants and got out of the stall...making sure not to make any eye contact. I washed my hands as the dad instructed the son to go tell his Mom to get him a change of clothes and for him to bring them back.
I headed out into the general waiting area trying to work my way to the dining area. As luck would have it I was blocked by the boy who was trying to whisper to his mom about what he needed. The mom in exasperation told the boy to speak up.And true to child like manner he speaks up in a loud voice "Dad crapped his pants in the bathroom and needs new clothes ".
I've never seen someone turn so red and exit the building so fast.
Ne
It was probably the apple cider. I had 2 large mugs of that and had to pull over on the shoulder between Columbia and Moberly to run and shit in the brush with a paper bag to wipe my ass with.
sec [Reply]
SR is always thinking in terms of helping his fellow CPers. He seems more than nice. Will buy some Kohls’ stock tomorrow as its price will surely rise on the news of SR’s review. [Reply]
