Originally Posted by :
Now that the full 11-minute recording of Chiefs wide receiver Tyreek Hill and his now former fiancee, Crystal Espinal, talking about violence in their relationship has been aired, many fans are saying wow, this changes everything.
It does? That Hill, who didn’t know Espinal was taping him, denies ever hitting her or their son in what he thought was a private conversation is neither surprising nor exculpatory.
Abusers typically tell not only the police but friends, family, therapists, priests and even themselves they’ve never done anything wrong.
And if anything, the fact that Hill now says he didn’t hit punch or choke Espinal in 2014 makes him look worse rather than better. He pleaded guilty to those charges, publicly apologized, went through extensive therapy and declared himself reformed after probation. If he’s now back to saying that none of this ever happened, that’s not just a lie but a worrying one.
“I didn’t touch you in 2014,” he says on the tape. “And put that on everything I love, bro. That’s the real truth.”
That Espinal isn’t screaming at him that no, it’s not the truth, real or otherwise, is taken by some supporters as proof that he is innocent.
But why a woman who has been injured by him before and he’s threatening to hurt again might not do that should be obvious.
When she instead repeatedly asks him where her bruises came from if he never hit her, he doesn’t answer because there isn’t an answer that he likes well enough to repeat.
On Thursday, Espinal filed a petition in Johnson County seeking a paternity test for their newborn twins. She has full custody of them — they live with her — and she is asking for child support and only supervised visits for Hill. Her lawyer in the matter is legal counsel for SAFEHOME, a Johnson County group that supports survivors of domestic violence.
The NFL, meanwhile, seems ready to let Hill off with a brief suspension because the legal case against him isn’t going anywhere, but these things are still true:
Hill’s son was removed from his home after a child abuse investigation was launched. The Johnson County district attorney said the 3-year-old child had been hurt, but he didn’t have enough proof to prosecute.
On the tape, we heard Hill threaten the mother of his children with physical violence: “You need to be scared of me, too, dumb bitch.” He berates and belittles, calls her “bro” and “bitch” and of course, claims she ruined his life.
Denial of all wrongdoing is so standard in abuse cases that just a look at Thursday’s Star provides other examples, including that of Scott Hacker, the now former Parkville police officer charged with domestic violence after allegedly shooting his gun inside his home, throwing the woman who called 911 onto the couch, grabbing her by the throat and blaming her for “ending his career” by calling for help. Both before and after the cops arrived, he said he hadn’t shot the gun or touched her. But oops: A security camera in the living room apparently recorded the assault.
What Espinal was trying to get was the audio equivalent of that video.
If the NFL lets Hill back on the field this season, it will send the message that making threats and showing you’ve learned nothing from probation is no real problem, as long as you can run fast enough. The help he needs is not more denial, but just the opposite.
To the rest of you who are intent on seeing Hill as the victim, KCTV as a villain for not immediately releasing the full tape, and Espinal as a “manipulator” for wanting evidence to back her up in court, we could suggest some reading on the well-researched subject of abuse. But why, when you seem to prefer not to know?
Originally Posted by DJ's left nut:
Oh that's not hard to answer at all.
Look at how accessible Patrick Mahomes is on his social media and how much people love him for it. If you can keep from stepping on your dick - yeah, you should absolutely run your own account. It's a Q-Rating goldmine.
Patrick is beloved by everyone right now for being by all accounts a great player and a great person, so it's working for him. Most people aren't in such a unique position.
It can definitely help build your brand if it's managed well, no question about that. I just think that if I were an agent advising a young athlete who isn't a Patrick Mahomes, I'd try to get them to let the agency's social media people handle most of it, and get them to stay away from it for the most part as a distraction.
You don't need to be a bad person to cause a huge problem for yourself on social media, even the best people can be caught in a weak moment by an environment that is always trying to provoke and tear people down. [Reply]
I rarely do this, but feel it's important to share this from my @TheAthleticKC chat today. Forgive me for the few typos, as I write pretty fast during the hour to answer every question.
Originally Posted by DJ's left nut:
Oh that's not hard to answer at all.
Look at how accessible Patrick Mahomes is on his social media and how much people love him for it. If you can keep from stepping on your dick - yeah, you should absolutely run your own account. It's a Q-Rating goldmine.
It's a boom or bust strategy. Some people can do it and win big, but most can't. Maybe you have to be savvy enough to set specific rules about what you will or will not post about, and rigidly stick to them. Patrick seems savvy, and he's got a big-time agent who's likely advising him on a social media policy. So maybe he'll be fine. But I'm at the point now where I'd just rather have guys who play football if they're not a golden god like Patrick Mahomes. [Reply]
Jeff Rosen needs to be fired, and the Star has to employ a person who has the situational awareness concerning the demographics they are writing for [Reply]
I rarely do this, but feel it's important to share this from my @TheAthleticKC chat today. Forgive me for the few typos, as I write pretty fast during the hour to answer every question.
I like how he can write something that everyone involved in this should be saying yet no one else can, I'm sure that wasn't hard for him to say they all fucked up and have to be better. [Reply]
Originally Posted by Mecca:
I like how he can write something that everyone involved in this should be saying yet no one else can, I'm sure that wasn't hard for him to say they all fucked up and have to be better.
And what's so galling is that he was probably the most evenhanded of EVERYONE involved in this.
The guy that has arguably the least to apologize for is the only !@#$ing one willing to do it. [Reply]
Originally Posted by OnTheWarpath15:
Full agreement here.
Just an FYI that I'm sure will send people into a tizzy, he's predicting a suspension for Hill in the 4-6 games range, appealed down.
I'm sure that is because anyone not in Kansas City still thinks he broke the kids arm and is a violent monster that should never play again. Unfortunately the NFL cares what these people think. [Reply]
Originally Posted by Mecca:
I'm sure that is because anyone not in Kansas City still thinks he broke the kids arm and is a violent monster that should never play again. Unfortunately the NFL cares what these people think.
This isn't true.
I don't live in kc and no one I've talked to here thinks he broke his childs arm [Reply]
Originally Posted by Mecca:
I'm sure that is because anyone not in Kansas City still thinks he broke the kids arm and is a violent monster that should never play again. Unfortunately the NFL cares what these people think.
Yep. It's all about public perception.
If he's not suspended or given a light one, then people will blow up the league on social media claiming they continue to be soft on DV. [Reply]
I don't live in kc and no one I've talked to here thinks he broke his childs arm
Where do you live?
Because everything I have seen is casual fans or fans in places like I dunno Seattle don't really know much about this other than what was on ESPN or big time sites which basically just say he's an abusive POS. [Reply]
Because everything I have seen is casual fans or fans in places like I dunno Seattle don't really know much about this other than what was on ESPN or big time sites which basically just say he's an abusive POS.