Originally Posted by 'Hamas' Jenkins:
You take too long to make decisions. On that intermediate route, notice how the WR had to dive for the ball, and that you were making a tight fit between three defenders. It took a great play to pull that off, whereas Kelce was open on the drag route immediately. Given that it was third and short, tossing it to him in that situation is almost a certain catch and conversion.
TE drag routes are unstoppable against zone coverage in football video games if you time the throw correctly.
No Mitch Schwartz. Can the Chiefs hold off Von Miller and get back to .500?
Spoiler!
The Broncos open with a pair of field goals. The Chiefs get going and...
MotherFUCKING cockSUCKING piece of SHIT game. 13 to FUCKING nothing. Fucking CHRIST. Fortunately I am moving the ball well and...
SON OF A BITCH LOB PASS YOU FUCKING RETARD
IT'S TWENTY TO FUCKING NOTHING. You know what this calls for: DEEP BALLS.
Are you Matt fucking Cassel, Pat? What the hell, man.
Oh, thank CHRIST. That's what you get for covering Cesar with Von Miller, Donks. To the second half! KEEP FIRING, ASSHOLES!
We back in this shit. After a Donkey turnover...
LOL Cesar Seamster is unstoppable. That's nine touchdowns in six games. Denver gets a field goal to take the lead back, but after a clock-killing drive, Mahomes has third and 4 at the Denver 12...and I'm not fucking running the ball here and playing for the field goal.
A LIGHTNING FAST READ AND A GREAT CATCH. Now, CUT THEIR THROATS, LORD PATRICK.
House Mahomes. First of his name. The Chiefs are getting back to .500. So let's just kick the XP...
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!
YES THEY MADE THE FIELD GOAL. I HATE EVERYTHING. I GOT STRAIGHT FUCKED!!!!
You're up 4; going up 5 does nothing. Your offense has been humming and getting to 6 theoretically at least forces them to hit the XP to win. They've already blocked a kick on the day.
So why kick it at all? 'The chart' would say to go for 2, I'm sure.
Returning it and then winning on a figgy at the gun to knock out 5 pts there is just fantastic. That's 'break my controller' shit when I was a kid. [Reply]
Originally Posted by DJ's left nut:
So to MMQB the hell out of this - why kick it?
You're up 4; going up 5 does nothing. Your offense has been humming and getting to 6 theoretically at least forces them to hit the XP to win. They've already blocked a kick on the day.
So why kick it at all? 'The chart' would say to go for 2, I'm sure.
Returning it and then winning on a figgy at the gun to knock out 5 pts there is just fantastic. That's 'break my controller' shit when I was a kid.
That's the normal with All Madden in that game. It's not harder....it just increases the chances of the CPU fucking you over in different ways. [Reply]
Originally Posted by DJ's left nut:
So to MMQB the hell out of this - why kick it?
You're up 4; going up 5 does nothing. Your offense has been humming and getting to 6 theoretically at least forces them to hit the XP to win. They've already blocked a kick on the day.
So why kick it at all? 'The chart' would say to go for 2, I'm sure.
Returning it and then winning on a figgy at the gun to knock out 5 pts there is just fantastic. That's 'break my controller' shit when I was a kid.
Holy shit. I can't believe I didn't think of this.
Usually you're OK if you delay the snap on a kick...WHICH I DID ON BOTH KICKS.
I think from now on I'm going with EXTREME delays on all kicks. :-)
You gotta like the challenge, though. This isn't your father's Madden. [Reply]
The Cardinals have a rookie QB with a Mahomes-esque arm. He puts it to good use.
Well, that helps. I have a 10-0 lead and threaten to make it 17-0.
You stupid ass rookie. That was a perfect pass. Oh well. You'll learn.
Good job, rookie. You learned. The Cardinals find themselves down 20-0 now. What do they have left?
LOL YES. My much maligned defense is destroying Arizona's offense. With the ball at the 1, I should totally just dive into the line and go into halftime with this comfortable lead, right?
FUCK. THAT. SHIT.
99 FUCKING YARDS. Patrick Mahomes rules. The Chiefs move to 3-4, but not before some fucking bullshit at the end of this game of Madden 18: Dark Souls Edition!
Can the Chiefs get back to .500 and avenge that bullshit loss at Arrowhead?
Spoiler!
Facing Denver's vaunted pass rush and corners, the Chiefs choose to Herm this one up. Especially in light of the fact Denver is rplling out a rookie QB named Jack Lee for the first time. That is why we are running on third and 9.
And it WORKS! My rookie HB takes it to the house, in relief of the injured Kareem Hunt. Denver will probably find a way to fuck the Chiefs, though.
Now ain't that some shit. Not to worry, though. My ultra-conservative gameplan is working just fine.
Ahahahaha. You like my backup RT split out wide? Denver backs me up at the 1. GUESS WHAT'S COMING.
Damn, no TD this time but I've got control of this game now. Denver cannot possibly fuck me, right?
AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH
AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH
AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH
GOD DAMMIT PAT. YOU CAN'T WASTE A GOOD CLAY READ LIKE THAT.
Jack Lee cuts my throat. Son of a bitch. I pile up 480 total yards thanks to a couple of garbage time bombs and still lose, dropping to 3-5. Fucking Donkeys.
You should consider adjusting the All-Madden sliders if you haven't already. I can't stand to play on All-Madden with the standard slider settings. They have all of the DBs in the league making Peters esque plays on the football, and mediocre edge rushers are unblockable. Average joe RBs break tackles like Kareem Hunt.
Can't deal with that unrealistic nonsense. [Reply]
