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Hall of Classics>Marriage Question
royr17 07:27 PM 02-20-2005
Ok lets start here.

I need some help with some things i need to know on gettin married, the do's, the dont's, the things you need to know about that.

I see you guys here some are married some arent so the ones that know stuff i need to know let me know about it.

So what are the things i should know about it, cause i dont wanna wait my whole life to get married, i actually wanna be married before i turn 26 which is 6 years from now.

But I wanna get started early in startin a family, so what are the do's and dont's in marriage ???
Bearcat 01:22 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by Chico Diablo:
"One person for everyone" means that there is only one person that you will have the strongest feeling for...if you've met that person, you have to learn how to close your eyes again (I'm speaking metaphorically, so don't be an asshole and say that you can do that when you blink and sleep)...you don't have to be with that person, just close your eyes so you're blindly attracted to others just like everyone else in the world. You're not truely gonna be happy, but who cares.
With 6 billion people on earth, and growing, love is not 1:1. If you do believe that, it's hard to imagine someone actually finding that one, and harder to imagine that someone would actually find that one before the age of 20 and know they're the one. AND, it's even harder to believe that it always works both ways; that the feeling is mutual (spelled out, Slayer's one is Janet and Janet's one is Slayer and not someone else).

And on top of that, you can't sit behind your computer monitor and deem every relationship that isn't the one:the one as not being truly happy. [insert happiness cliche here]

Originally Posted by Chico Diablo:
I was showing how society has painted an image of what human nature is. For instance, there's a majority that says one thing is a brilliant conclusion and they teach it as fact to all future generations...the vast majority of people are going to believe it because it's all they've ever known, then there are going to be the few that start to question it and say that what was complete BS. A good example, although by far not the best, is religion.
Uh, finding someone attractive is opinion... While society does show you what it deems attractive, everyone has a different opinion of what's really attractive. I don't find certain people attractive because people have been telling me since birth that I should find them attractive. Even if society hadn't helped mold what I find attractive or not, it still doesn't mean I can shut it off just because I found "the one".
Slayer Diablo 01:24 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by gochiefs:
Can I get some advice on polygamy? I'm interested.
It's legal in Saudi Arabia, but you'll still need to get rich enough to buy the wives...
lardass 01:34 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by gochiefs:
Can I get some advice on polygamy? I'm interested.
One woman is hard enough to please, why would you want two and better yet, why would you think you can handle two or more women?
|Zach| 01:42 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by Phobia:

When you truly come to the realization that you don't know anything, it will be the greatest moment of enlightenment in your entire life.
:-) :-)
Slayer Diablo 01:42 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by Bearcat:
With 6 billion people on earth, and growing, love is not 1:1. If you do believe that, it's hard to imagine someone actually finding that one, and harder to imagine that someone would actually find that one before the age of 20 and know they're the one. AND, it's even harder to believe that it always works both ways; that the feeling is mutual (spelled out, Slayer's one is Janet and Janet's one is Slayer and not someone else).
Yes, it's hard to imagine, but that doesn't matter. Just because one's mind cannot handle the concept of trillions upon trillions of stars, planets, etc. in an infinitely growing void doesn't mean that such does not exist. And just because one cannot handle the concept of 6 billion people having the mutual connection only between the two of them doesn't mean that such connection does not exist. Of course it's going to be rare for two people who are connected to find each other and it's a good reason to not even bother searching, but it does exist. Of course, if it feels better to just not find that connection, then by all means go ahead and keep the blind attractions for others. Such attractions can make people happy, but it's not going to be true happiness.

Originally Posted by :
And on top of that, you can't sit behind your computer monitor and deem every relationship that isn't the one:the one as not being truly happy. [insert happiness cliche here]
Damn, I answered this one up there....oh well.

Originally Posted by :
Uh, finding someone attractive is opinion... While society does show you what it deems attractive, everyone has a different opinion of what's really attractive. I don't find certain people attractive because people have been telling me since birth that I should find them attractive. Even if society hadn't helped mold what I find attractive or not, it still doesn't mean I can shut it off just because I found "the one".
It's a mindsets established by others that say "you should find the person who makes you truly happy" and "this is what that person should be like:..." that create the idea of "I should be attracted to this person, and that person, and that person...." As for shutting it off, you're not the one to shut it off...it's like those computers that shut down when a specific something is sensed.
bogie 02:03 PM 02-21-2005
Chico, I am very impressed with your ability to spread bullsh*t. You stick to your guns. If in a few years If I ever need to hire an attorney I'd contact you. You are so obviously inmature, but you are consistant. Please allow yourself some room for improvement. Most successful people in life surround themselves with people that are better than and more intelligent than themselves.
III, enjoy your relationship for what it is. Don't mess it up with marriage. Let the relationship flow and you go with the flow. Don't push it.
Both of you need to go to your rooms and don't come out until you understand that you're to young to be having these grown up conversations.
lardass 02:26 PM 02-21-2005
Yeah... I think I am going to like it here. :-)
Hammock Parties 02:29 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by lardass:
Yeah... I think I am going to like it here. :-)
This is just the tip of the iceberg, my friend. Wait until we get you properly introduced to SDChiefsfan.
Hammock Parties 02:30 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by lardass:
One woman is hard enough to please, why would you want two and better yet, why would you think you can handle two or more women?
I am the chosen one.
Slayer Diablo 02:45 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by lardass:
Yeah... I think I am going to like it here. :-)
You'll enjoy it...just remember to not take any insults seriously. Once you're completely ready, there will be a day where we all get together and roast the hell outta ya...those are some good threads--possibly as entertaining as this one was to a lot of people.
Phobia 02:52 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by Chico Diablo:
You'll enjoy it...just remember to not take any insults seriously.
That rule is valid for everybody except you. We really do want you to leave and come back when you have a clue.
lardass 02:52 PM 02-21-2005
I can handle it, sarcasm is what I am all about. :-)
|Zach| 02:54 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by lardass:
I can handle it, sarcasm is what I am all about. :-)
Well thats nice...but he was referring to insults...

Sarcasm and insults don't always go hand in hand here. :-)
Slayer Diablo 03:04 PM 02-21-2005
Originally Posted by bogie:
Chico, I am very impressed with your ability to spread bullsh*t. You stick to your guns. If in a few years If I ever need to hire an attorney I'd contact you. You are so obviously inmature, but you are consistant. Please allow yourself some room for improvement. Most successful people in life surround themselves with people that are better than and more intelligent than themselves.
....
It's not bullsh*t, but thanks anyway...kind of.
Bearcat 03:10 PM 02-21-2005
What basis do you have for claiming that it's impossible? All you know is what you have from your experiences. Now, I'll admit that it's rare to find such a thing to happen, but it's not impossible.

You might as well be arguing that there is an Easter bunny, because no, I don't have proof that there's no Easter bunny, but that doesn't make your claim that there is one anything less than complete BS.

I go to Capital Grille. I'm not going to wake up the next morning and have no desire to ever eat a steak at the Outback or anywhere else. (don't argue that I'm not truly in love with the steak, because that's not the point... and I am! :-) ). It's the same thing. Preferences change, but a switch isn't thrown one day and you say "I only have eyes for you". Anyone that has ever said that is full of it. You can't be attracted to one person, yet find those same set of qualities unattractive in someone else.



The highschool feeling part is SAYING that you'll do it and then wimp out when push comes to shove. It's part of the "law" when you actually do it.

No, it's a high school feeling to even think it. Through thick or thin, sickness and health... sure. Eternity of pain for a split second of company? That's either high school or a really bad monster ballad.


How else would anyone know that something is both possible and probable?

Well, elaborate on it... what, in your life -- experience or link or whatever -- has shown you that both are possible & probable?


You know that this statement of yours shouldn't even be dignified with a response.... 9 short flings, and 1 that was known although not a relationship.

Sure it does..... Before people take love advice from anyone, they like to know where that advice is coming from.

Pointing out some facts does not make anyone an expert. I can point out that one plus one equals two, the diaganols of a rectangle are equal to one another, and sine equals csc(90degrees - Pi), but that doesn't make me a math expert. As I stated about the statistics, those were rough estimates that I provided to give an idea of how probable it was.

This is weak and you know it. Pointing out a mathematical fact is FAR different from stating a fact on love. When someone says something is a fact about a subject as ...what's the word... a subject like love, you're implying you either know an awful lot about love or have had quite a bit of experience in love.


You--specifically--are going to wait four years to hear the story. You don't seem to take information from people very well unless they're completely adults...if you'd like to try to disprove that, go ahead

Sure -- Psicosis. For a long time I thought he was as old or older than me, because (sometimes) he can act like it. Knowing that he's your age hasn't changed anything, because he can still (sometimes) act older than he is. It's not age. It's you :-)
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