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Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and
The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review
The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
Ace Gunner 06:04 AM 07-21-2012
Originally Posted by BoneKrusher:
i only have one question after looking at this thread.
how can Pioli or any GM in the league say Matt Cassel is our starter?
Now you know why the NFL restricts camera views from showing WR routes at the snap.
[Reply]
BoneKrusher 06:08 AM 07-21-2012
Originally Posted by chiefsfootballfan:
Now you know why the NFL restricts camera views from showing WR routes at the snap.
:-)
[Reply]
Jethopper 06:22 AM 07-21-2012
"Give me Stanzi, or give me death!" - Patrick "Surtain" Henry
[Reply]
Pasta Giant Meatball 06:35 AM 07-21-2012
Great, now he'll have a career year.
[Reply]
Barret 06:49 AM 07-21-2012
Originally Posted by Toad King:
Also, Barret got this ball rolling.
Thank you, this is exactly what I was looking for. I would give you rep but I have to spread more rep around first or something.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 07:50 AM 07-21-2012
I need not your rep, fellow Patriot. Only your signature.
[Reply]
Molitoth 07:58 AM 07-21-2012
Great stuff Clay.
[Reply]
Direckshun 08:08 AM 07-21-2012
This is outstanding.
[Reply]
wazu 08:10 AM 07-21-2012
Originally Posted by Toad King:
I need not your rep, fellow Patriot. Only your signature.
Wazu

I want Pioli to be able to read this without his spectacles.
[Reply]
notorious 08:23 AM 07-21-2012
Good work.
[Reply]
BoneKrusher 08:24 AM 07-21-2012
when the Saints play the Chiefs i bet their defense has a Fine instead of a Bounty for any player getting near Cassel.
i mean they cant have him leaving the game, they might lose.
[Reply]
mdchiefsfan 08:55 AM 07-21-2012
signed
[Reply]
Three7s 08:58 AM 07-21-2012
All we need now is LA Chiefs Fan to show up and this thread will be complete.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 09:01 AM 07-21-2012
Originally Posted by Three7s:
All we need now is LA Chiefs Fan to show up and this thread will be complete.
Our Benedict Arnold.
[Reply]
gblowfish 09:06 AM 07-21-2012
Leave my hometown OUTTA this. Assholes!
[Reply]
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