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Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and
The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review
The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
scho63 10:39 AM 11-13-2012
Cassel spent his entire Trojan career as a backup behind Heisman Trophy winners Carson Palmer and Matt Leinart. Cassel was the backup for Palmer during his Heisman-winning 2002 season. In the fall, Cassel lost the battle for the starting position to the previous third-string quarterback in Leinart. As a result of Leinart's success, Cassel spent time at tight end and wide receiver in 2003, and some special teams that year. He started at H-back against California in 2001 as well, making his lone collegiate start at that position. During his four seasons there, Cassel completed 19 of 33 passes for 192 yards, with no touchdowns and one interception

This is the guy Scott Pioli bet the future of the Chiefs on.......this alone is enough for a firing yet Clark Hunt is a DOLT for letting him do it!!! Two idiots.
[Reply]
bobbything 10:42 AM 11-13-2012
Originally Posted by scho63:
Cassel completed 19 of 33 passes for 192 yards, with no touchdowns and one interception[/B][/I]
Little did we know his career stats at USC would be his game average in Kansas City.
[Reply]
65TPT 10:52 AM 11-13-2012
You can just see it on my face,that Matt cassels head is way way up my ass.
Attached: Cassels head is up my ass..GIF (18.9 KB) 
[Reply]
Tribal Warfare 12:03 PM 11-13-2012

[Reply]
whoman69 03:28 PM 11-13-2012
Cassel was talking like we did great last night. We scored 13 points and you were 11-26 for 154 yards
[Reply]
Sweet Daddy Hate 04:33 PM 11-13-2012
Cassel did great last night. Did exactly as I wanted him to at the end.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 04:54 PM 11-13-2012
NEW. GODDAMN. STATS.

25th in completion percentage
29th in yards
26th in yards per attempt
34th in longest pass completion
31st in TDs
31st in INTs
32nd in QB rating

HOLY SHIT. Updating OP stand by.
[Reply]
Sorter 04:56 PM 11-13-2012
Originally Posted by Tribal Warfare:

[Reply]
Munson 04:59 PM 11-13-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
NEW. GODDAMN. STATS.

25th in completion percentage
29th in yards
26th in yards per attempt
34th in longest pass completion
31st in TDs
31st in INTs
32nd in QB rating

HOLY SHIT. Updating OP stand by.
Bwahaha!

To the HindenPioli! :-)
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 04:59 PM 11-13-2012
Updated stats in bold from OP:

Originally Posted by :
Matt Cassel is 19-29 in his 48 career games with the Chiefs.

He is 15-9 in games where we ran the ball more than we threw it.
Originally Posted by :
A short list of quarterbacks Gus Cassel has faced throughout his career that might be considered "elite," or "definitely not Cassel in any way":

Rivers, P. Manning, Roethlisberger, E. Manning, Romo, Schaub, Flacco, Stafford, Ryan, Brees

Cassel's record against this group: 4-17 (.190).

Gus Cassel's Record Against Elite Quarterbacks, By Year:


2012: 1-5
2011: 1-2
2010: 1-3
2009: 1-4
2008: 0-3
In a week or two I will be able to update stats against winning teams and playoff teams as that stuff gets sorted out.
[Reply]
Coogs 05:06 PM 11-13-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
NEW. GODDAMN. STATS.

25th in completion percentage
29th in yards
26th in yards per attempt
34th in longest pass completion
31st in TDs
31st in INTs
32nd in QB rating

HOLY SHIT. Updating OP stand by.
34th... :-)
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 05:10 PM 11-13-2012
We are moving on from including Cassel's playoff game in his stats.

These are his last 17 regular season games as an NFL QB. Shocking that you remove the playoff stats and he still is garbage.

Matt Cassel's last 17 regular season games.

313-530 (59.05%)
3,416 yards (6.44 YPA)
16 TD
21 INT
12 fumbles
71.7 QB Rating

Record: 5-12
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 05:14 AM 11-14-2012
:-)

Originally Posted by :
- Short passing was not a forté for Matt Cassel this week. On passes between the line of scrimmage and 9 yards deep he was an entirely disappointing 3 of 9 for 24 yards.

[Reply]
Hammock Parties 06:46 PM 11-14-2012
Pro Football Focus really brings things into...Focus...

Cliffs: Cassel is the lowest rated QB in the league when given 2.6 seconds or more to throw.


[Reply]
Pasta Giant Meatball 06:48 PM 11-14-2012
What a complete piece of shit.
[Reply]
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