He makes the best GDT’s on the planet.
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Dad gum it.

Am I supposed to be doing this one? It's almost midnight and I still haven't learned how to do super secret spoiler deals and things.

Honestly, I'm beginning to feel really bad about Mr. bigjosh. First of all, he sounds big. Second of all, he seems to enjoy doing the game threads. Third of all, my Catholic shaker-thing that makes smoke is depleted so I'd have to set my chair on fire in order to generate sufficient juju to win by 38 points. (I'm willing to do that, but you guys would have to crowdfund me a new damn chair.)

Fourth (or fifth .. whatever) of all, can somebody talk to Mr. bigjosh for me (I really don't know him at all) and tell him I have no intention of taking his job? You guys have put me in a very uncomfortable position here. He's big, okay?

FAX THE DIDN'T COME BACK TO HAVE RESPONSIBILITY
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You ushered in the Pat Mahomes era. With great power comes great responsibility. :-)
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His game thread once again has brought us victory. The prophecies about a game thread savior that would come to lead us were true. It could be the poetry, I think.

EL WILL FOLLOW HIM :-)
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Poor FAX. He's going to be chained to his computer for all eternity after this start.
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I'm sure that Bigjosh will be have an Alex Smith attitude about it. He'll step aside to let you take over, because you're clearly a franchise game day thread starter.
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Eww I DO like FAX!
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It's almost time. Someone pick up the red telephone and put up the FAX-signal!


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Fax taught me to defend women and how to kill a man with one hand.
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Guys ...

I've used up almost all my mojo tools here. It's not that I've lost faith ... I have total faith and confidence in the Chiefs and I fully expect to win this game. Actually, I have no doubt.

It's just that my Catholic shaker thing is low on smoke, my candles are burned to puddles, some worthless bastard stole my travel mug and I'm using my best chalice for coffee. And to top it off, my voodoo ritual knife is bent after a full month of stabbing QB dolls.

I'm running low on metaphysical appliances here.

If we're going to make this happen, we need everybody to visualize a dominating victory with no fear or apprehension in their hearts. It would also help if you close your eyes and click your heels together three times. Thank you.

EDIT: Oh ... and no more rainbow-farting, flying unicorn gifs if you please.

FAX THE LOW ON METAPHYSICAL APPLIANCES
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See, Mr. FAX, you're like Dumbo. You never needed the magic feather at all!
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BAMF
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The legend continues to grown, but how did it first happen?

Mr. FAX - his arm draped with the shimmering CP BBQ censer, with his other arm held aloft his golden laptop, signifying by some combination of divine providence and random chance that he, FAX, was to start the game thread.

And although strange fellow on an internet forum imploring you to start the game threads in the middle of the night is no basis for a system of governance, Mr. FAX has the supreme power of the game thread by mandate from the CP masses.

He must lead us! Bring forth our champion!
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FAX is late
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Un ... possible.

Making juju is not like baking a casserole or jerking oneself off, my friend.

As is well known by the Ashanti, the Ibo, and the Ogbomosho themselves, the practice of divination and is not ruled by time ... it rules time. These are extreme metaphysical modalities that are, in fact, far beyond the reach of (or even the most minor influence of) time and space.

Besides ... I didn't volunteer for this job, you know. As a matter of fact, I've attempted to relinquish this responsibility on several separate occasions.

So, if you want me to continue to commune with the freaking spirit world while investigating the ins-and-outs of shamanistic basketry, you should chill a bit.

FAX
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