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The Lounge>Selling a house
Bugeater 01:28 AM 02-07-2019
Is fucking maddening. It's nothing but a goddamn string of useless fucking people with their hands out wanting money.

Seller's agent: Try to get you to underprice your home for a quick, easy sale. Not good at keeping you informed.

Buyers agent: Sit around and wait for a buyer to find something they like online, and go unlock a fucking door for them.

Home inspectors: Biggest fucking sham ever. OH WE PROTECT THE BUYER. Yeah just the dumbass lazy buyers who aren't capable of walking around a house and spotting obvious defects on their own. Mostly a way to extort more money from the seller after a deal has been made.

And the closing costs...title fee escrow fee tax stamp blah blah blah what in the earthly fuck is all this shit?

$205,000 house....$25,000 just GONE off the top.

Hopefully I'll die in the next house we buy so I don't ever have to go through this shit again.
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D2112 07:40 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Bugeater:
This experience sure as hell makes renting sound like an attractive option. After the fees and other bullshit, plus paying off our 25k HELOC for renovations, we're walking away with a whopping 40k more than we paid for it 20 goddamn years ago.
My friend lives in Ohio, he grew up here and moved there in the early 90’s. He started flipping houses to rent out about 10 years ago. He bought some of them for as little as $25,000 outright. He then refurbishes the entire house. He has 6 houses rented out at at least $1,200.00 per month. Currently working on house number 7. He has a full time job and does this on the weekends. After he finishes house number 7 he can retire lol. He pays $600 a year in property taxes per house.
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KChiefs1 07:40 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Bugeater:
Shit, forgot to rant about the ridiculous disclosure.

How many ceiling fans are in the house? Seriously? I have to answer that? We're to the point where we can't even expect a buyer to walk through a house and count the number of fucking ceiling fans on their own?


Wait until the buyer sues you & their home inspector because of the front door sticking & cracks appearing a year after you sold the house.
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D2112 07:44 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by HemiEd:
That is just crazy, similar to what we had in Illinois.

When we were ready to retire from there and sell our home, I put it out in the listing that I would pay a $2000 bonus, if sold in the first 30 days. MLS said that was against their rules, but the word was already out. :-)

I was thrilled to pay it when it happened, and felt like I was being released from prison.
Yeah and now my douchebag governor wants a “rain tax” lol to fix all our roads. In hindsight I can sell and move to PA and still work here. But then I have the exit tax shit. My asshole feels like the Grand Canyon
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HemiEd 07:49 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by D2112:
Yeah and now my douchebag governor wants a “rain tax” lol to fix all our roads. In hindsight I can sell and move to PA and still work here. But then I have the exit tax shit. My asshole feels like the Grand Canyon
Holy shit, we had that to. I was so pissed off about it that it wasn't healthy.
It just amazes me how many ways they figure out how to tax a person.

Do you have to annually purchase a sticker on your car to have the privilege to park in your own driveway? That is so common in Illinois that the citizens think it is normal and they are used to it.
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Bugeater 07:55 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by KChiefs1:
Wait until the buyer sues you & their home inspector because of the front door sticking & cracks appearing a year after you sold the house.
Nah, this place is 55 years old and there are no signs that is has shifted a bit in that time. Not one single crack in the basement and garage floor or anywhere on the foundation. No stress fractures in the drywall. It's rock solid. Whoever is buying it is hitting the jackpot.
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D2112 07:55 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by HemiEd:
Holy shit, we had that to. I was so pissed off about it that it wasn't healthy.
It just amazes me how many ways they figure out how to tax a person.

Do you have to annually purchase a sticker on your car to have the privilege to park in your own driveway? That is so common in Illinois that the citizens think it is normal and they are used to it.
Exit tax is 4% here :-) and No I can park in my driveway in peace lol


We have what’s called inspection stickers on our cars. It has an electronic bar code on it that a cop can scan driving by. It used to be every year, but now it’s every other year. They check everything and if you fail you have 30 days to make the necessary repairs.
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Buehler445 07:56 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Dayze:
my wife and I bought a house in October.
We started looking in April.
Looked at 90 houses
Offered on 8 houses
2 Accepted but walked from both due to inspection (major issues).
Finally got the one we're in and closed in late October.


it was, by far, one of the worst experiences of our lives. we would catch a house that came on the market and view it that day by 5pm; and when we'd show up, there would literally be cars lined up down the street to view it with agents. and once inside, you'd view it with probably 6 other people minimum. Then, if you did offer, there were already 8 offers submitted.

We offered on once house 5% over asking, and it eneded up selling/closing for 23% OVER asking price. and our offer was in the rough alingnment with what other homes were selling at / appraisal ballpark.

awful experience. If I never have to move/sell/buy again, it'll be too soon.
Jesus fuck. Where do you live?

Originally Posted by Bugeater:
Yep, I got stung for $5000 on that. Apparently "that's just how it works" now. The goddamn realtor commission already comes out of my proceeds, now that too? I suppose as long as I get that when I buy the next place it's a big whatever, but I don't understand why it costs that much to close on a house. It's a fucking racket.
Fuck that noise. Reject it and counter.

Originally Posted by Bugeater:
Ok, I miscalculated, only $21.5k

11,500 realtor commission
5,000 buyer closing costs
2,000 bullshit from the home inspection that I'm not allowed to fix myself
2,000 seller closing costs
1,000 prorated property taxes

I'll still agree with "fucked in the ass" though.
Is the stuff you have to fix because it is a government loan?
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Sorce 08:04 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by :
5,000 buyer closing costs
2,000 bullshit from the home inspection that I'm not allowed to fix myself
These are both things you are allowed to negotiate. Sounds like you had an awful realtor. If you had originally agreed to pay 5k in closing costs (some buyers will ask for this instead of lowering the price on the house) I would have told them hell no on the additional 2k of repairs.

We just bought a house, asked for 7k off the asking price and found issues during the inspection. I could fix a lot of them myself we asked for another 1000 to fix some stuff found in the inspection, agreed on 500 back at closing.
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Bugeater 08:07 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Buehler445:
Fuck that noise. Reject it and counter.
Too late for that.

Originally Posted by Buehler445:
Is the stuff you have to fix because it is a government loan?
No, just stupid shit, a lot of it I was aware of but hadn't had the time to repair yet. I figured whatever they found I could just fix by closing. What my realtor failed to tell me was that they would require all repairs be done by a qualified contractor. Some of the items were things that were clearly visible when the offer was made and a few others were plain absurd. I was ready to go to war over it at first, but then decided the 2k wasn't worth our sanity and I've been working on the place for 5 months straight anyway and I'm sick of it and I still have a metric shit ton of work to do to get us out of here by March 1st so I'll eat it to get the deal done.
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TEX 08:11 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Sorce:
These are both things you are allowed to negotiate. Sounds like you had an awful realtor. If you had originally agreed to pay 5k in closing costs (some buyers will ask for this instead of lowering the price on the house) I would have told them hell no on the additional 2k of repairs.

We just bought a house, asked for 7k off the asking price and found issues during the inspection. I could fix a lot of them myself we asked for another 1000 to fix some stuff found in the inspection, agreed on 500 back at closing.
This is exactly the case. Its all based on negotiations.
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Bugeater 08:11 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Sorce:
These are both things you are allowed to negotiate. Sounds like you had an awful realtor. If you had originally agreed to pay 5k in closing costs (some buyers will ask for this instead of lowering the price on the house) I would have told them hell no on the additional 2k of repairs.

We just bought a house, asked for 7k off the asking price and found issues during the inspection. I could fix a lot of them myself we asked for another 1000 to fix some stuff found in the inspection, agreed on 500 back at closing.
I honestly don't know if there's such a thing as a good one. The first one we talked to wanted me to ask around 183k, she got laughed out of the door. And the one we used when we bought the place failed me in several ways as well. I don't believe any of them have the client's best interests in mind.
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HemiEd 08:15 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by D2112:
Exit tax is 4% here :-) and No I can park in my driveway in peace lol


We have what’s called inspection stickers on our cars. It has an electronic bar code on it that a cop can scan driving by. It used to be every year, but now it’s every other year. They check everything and if you fail you have 30 days to make the necessary repairs.
4 percent is robbery, ****ing thieves.

Oh we had inspection stickers as well, and I had no problem with that as it helped to keep clunkers off the roads, but this sticker was just another tax. No explanation or benefit to it, other than a way for each village to extort more money from you.

IIRC it was $25 per vehicle per year. Not a lot of money, but the fact that they could write you a ticket for not having one parked in your own driveway pissed me off. The Mrs. paid that crap each year even though I didn't agree
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Dayze 08:22 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Buehler445:
Jesus ****. Where do you Live?

JoCo Ks.
if a house was anywhere near being considered move in ready, they were sold the day they went on the market.

It was definitely a balancing act on my part. I wasn’t hip in paying a ton then having to drop probably 20k on fixing shit and countless weekends working on it...then hopefully get money back when I sold it. Not to mention, I have zero tools so any project is already a money suck because I’d have to buy tools etc.

So there were plenty of houses out there, but they needed quite a bit of work. I decided it was worth it to just be patient and when I found the house, go after it. Luckily I found a complete down to the stud remodel. New wiring, new ac, furnace, new appliances, floors, doors, etc. I sacrificed a little on location, backs up to a busy street. But got a 3 br, 2 full bath 2 car ranch with main floor laundry. Which is what I wanted when we started alll this shit last April.

With this house, all I have to do is maintain it, and not have to deal with any major projects. Which is nice, since I have virtually zero interest in owning a home to begin with. Lol. But, with rent in this area, it’s basically a little cheaper to buy.
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seclark 08:27 AM 02-07-2019
how many ceiling fans are in the house?
sec
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Bugeater 08:27 AM 02-07-2019
Originally Posted by Dayze:
JoCo Ks.
if a house was anywhere near being considered move in ready, they were sold the day they went on the market.
We're looking at moving to Cheyenne, and it's about the same way there. If we see something we really like we almost have to put in an offer without looking at it, which I am not comfortable with for obvious reasons. We're going out there this weekend to look at a few but I have no idea if they'll still be available by then. It's certainly not making this process any easier.
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