ChiefsPlanet Mobile
Page 39 of 65
« First < 293536373839 4041424349 > Last »
Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and
The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review
The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
L.A. Chieffan 07:17 PM 09-30-2012
It's not tennis.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 07:21 PM 09-30-2012
Matt Cassclown is having a stellar year.



Last 15 games:


274 for 481 (56.9%)
2,956 yards (6.14 YPA)
15 TD
21 INT
46 sacks (1 sack every 10.4 attempts)
67.3 rating

Soon we will hit an entire season of Cassel suck, compiled. Should we throw a party?
[Reply]
stonedstooge 07:26 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Matt Cassclown is having a stellar year.



Last 15 games:


274 for 481 (56.9%)
2,956 yards (6.14 YPA)
15 TD
21 INT
46 sacks (1 sack every 10.4 attempts)
67.3 rating

Soon we will hit an entire season of Cassel suck, compiled. Should we throw a party?
Bout time for the old Pisoli fake Casshole injury to occur. My guess is next week against Baltimore
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 07:36 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by stonedstooge:
Bout time for the old Pisoli fake Casshole injury to occur. My guess is next week against Baltimore
NO!!!!

HIS PUNISHMENT MUST BE MORE SEVERE.

When the Patriot Way is ashes, you have my permission to get hurt, Casshole.


[Reply]
Chiefs Pantalones 08:36 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Matt Cassclown is having a stellar year.



Last 15 games:


274 for 481 (56.9%)
2,956 yards (6.14 YPA)
15 TD
21 INT
46 sacks (1 sack every 10.4 attempts)
67.3 rating

Soon we will hit an entire season of Cassel suck, compiled. Should we throw a party?
What's his record again the last 15 games?
[Reply]
whoman69 08:39 PM 09-30-2012
Hangin's too good for him.
[Reply]
Coogs 08:47 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by Chiefs Pantalones:
What's his record again the last 15 games?
Looks like it would be 6-9 if he is not counting the Baltimore playoff game. 5-10 if he is.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 08:50 PM 09-30-2012
Yes, 5-10.
[Reply]
New World Order 09:16 PM 09-30-2012
His 12 rating really shouldn't be that good, he has had 4 garbage time TD's this season with one int, that being the buffalo game.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 09:18 PM 09-30-2012
If you take out the 2 garbage time Buffalo TDs and the garbage time TD today his rating is a sparkling 64.1.

I could take out the garbage time INT against Buffalo but fuck him.
[Reply]
Coogs 09:22 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
If you take out the 2 garbage time Buffalo TDs and the garbage time TD today his rating is a sparkling 64.1.

I could take out the garbage time INT against Buffalo but fuck him.
27-6 and he threw 2 TD's today. Both are garbage time IMO. What's his rating with 0 TD's today?
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 09:23 PM 09-30-2012
62.0

TDs are not weighted heavily enough, methinks.

Scary to think Casshole has thrown one "competitive" TD pass in 4 games.
[Reply]
New World Order 09:23 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
If you take out the 2 garbage time Buffalo TDs and the garbage time TD today his rating is a sparkling 64.1.

I could take out the garbage time INT against Buffalo but **** him.


We'll round down, 60 qb rating and he doesnt even deserve it.
[Reply]
Coogs 09:28 PM 09-30-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
62.0

TDs are not weighted heavily enough, methinks.

Scary to think Casshole has thrown one "competitive" TD pass in 4 games.
Thanks.

No kidding on the last part.
[Reply]
L.A. Chieffan 11:20 PM 09-30-2012
It's not golf.
[Reply]
Page 39 of 65
« First < 293536373839 4041424349 > Last »
Up