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Hall of Classics>Relationship Problem
RustShack 12:19 AM 04-16-2009
Say you've been with a girl for awhile, and your about to move in together. She goes to the bars with a few friends once every week or two and doesn't like you to come with. Her friend meets a guy and they start hanging out with his friends, and after a few weeks your girlfriend is going to a movie alone with one of the friends but she says its "just as friends". What would you do or think?
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Lumpy 09:30 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Gonzo:
That's ok, neither does the op apparently. :-)
That's mean. :-) How do u suppose u would react if u were in his situation there Mr Gonzo?
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Pants 09:31 AM 04-16-2009
All this online advice we have been giving him is nice and dandy but if the dude has feelings for the girl, he's devastated right about now. It's never easy to break things off, especially after years of seeing each other. Stay strong, man.
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CoMoChief 09:31 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by RustShack:
Say you've been with a girl for awhile, and your about to move in together. She goes to the bars with a few friends once every week or two and doesn't like you to come with. Her friend meets a guy and they start hanging out with his friends, and after a few weeks your girlfriend is going to a movie alone with one of the friends but she says its "just as friends". What would you do or think?
Ask her why isn't it ok for you to come with?

That's kinda a huge red flag. If it seems fishy, it's probably fishy business going on. just sayin.

There are a lot of fish in the sea, I would get out now before you move in and shit really hits the fan down the road and you've put yourself in a horrible position.
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Sure-Oz 09:32 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Metrolike:
All this online advice we have been giving him is nice and dandy but if the dude has feelings for the girl, he's devastated right about now. It's never easy to break things off, especially after years of seeing each other. Stay strong, man.
Agreed, easier said than done...it sucks, hopefully things work out for him
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Jilly 09:33 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Sully:
Girls Night Out=Okay
Other guys being at Girls Night Out= A long talk... a very long talk...
Going to a movie with only a guy= If it's not a dealbreaker...it's pretty damn close.
Agreed. Especially if you haven't known the guy for long. I mean, I have guy friends that I've known since I was practically born that I wouldn't ever go to a movie with alone...maybe dinner or happy hour, but never a movie.
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Jilly 09:35 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Katipan:
You're a pretty cool husband.
And yes, he is.
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Al Bundy 09:36 AM 04-16-2009
I have a feeling her bitter single friend is trying to keep her single as well.
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Donger 09:36 AM 04-16-2009
I don't understand all the "cut her loose" advice. For the sake of the time and emotion invested in the relationship, talk to her. She may just be having cold feet about moving in together.
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Gonzo 09:37 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Lumpy:
That's mean. :-) How do u suppose u would react if u were in his situation there Mr Gonzo?
I'm married to a good woman so I'm not worried about it there tastycakes.

However, if she were to do something like this, I sure as hell wouldn't sit around and ask for advice from these guys. I'd be living out of the pay by hour motel while contacting legal representation.
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MTG#10 09:39 AM 04-16-2009
Sorry dude, unless this guy is a pillowbiter they've most likely already fucked.
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Hootie 09:44 AM 04-16-2009
I learned a long time ago that, if you can't trust someone, they aren't worth being in a relationship with.

Obviously, since you brought up the fact she doesn't like going to the bars with you, you have breathed down her neck about it before...and it makes you come off as insecure, and girls HATE insecurity.

so I hate to say it, but it's a lost cause...it's not even talk worthy...she's moved on she just "cares" about you too much and doesn't know how to break it to you...

Sucks dude...I remember all throughout my first relationship I had the girl in my back pocket...I could break up with her, do whatever I wanted...hang out with my friends...basically treat her like shit and she'd run back to me every time because she couldn't "have" me (or some gay shit like that)...

Then I went away to school and started hearing these rumors about this girl "moving on"...which I took as a personal challenge...and so obviously I just HAD to get her back...and did...but suddenly she had the power over me...and suddenly I became jealous and stared asking questions and then it just all fell apart and HONESTLY, I would never do that to myself again...once a girl like that gets the power she starts doing shit like going out and not wanting you around, hitting movies with "just a friend"...it was a learning experience for me.

It's best for you to play it cool, flat out dump the bitch (even if that's the last thing you want to do), and act like a badass about it (because at least then you'll have the satisfaction of breaking things up that were pined for disaster anyways...and believe me it'll hurt her more if you break up with her because she thinks she's playing you)...

Just remember, because it's true, time does heel all wounds...no matter how much time you spent with the whore there will always be the next whore.

when things go bad for me in any part of my life...I just think to myself..."will I care in 5 years?" and then I get really drunk and have my roommate pee on me and all of my problems disappear!
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Mr. Plow 09:45 AM 04-16-2009

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gblowfish 09:46 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Hootie:
when things go bad for me in any part of my life...I just think to myself..."will I care in 5 years?" and then I get really drunk and have my roommate pee on me and all of my problems disappear!
This is why asking for life advice on the CP is generally not such a good idea.
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CoMoChief 09:46 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Jilly:
Agreed. Especially if you haven't known the guy for long. I mean, I have guy friends that I've known since I was practically born that I wouldn't ever go to a movie with alone...maybe dinner or happy hour, but never a movie.
I get your point, but really I dont see what the difference is between going to dinner or going to a movie. Is a movie supposed to be more "date-ish" ?
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Nzoner 09:47 AM 04-16-2009
Originally Posted by Jilly:
Agreed. Especially if you haven't known the guy for long. I mean, I have guy friends that I've known since I was practically born that I wouldn't ever go to a movie with alone...maybe dinner or happy hour, but never a movie.
Never a movie?Unless it's a drive-in theatre I would think happy hour would be the NEVER here,but then again the happy hours I attend are very happy.
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