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Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and
The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review
The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
In58men 03:01 PM 11-02-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
OP updated with the following.
These are pretty bad.


I saw at least 10 Chief fans wearing Cassel jerseys yesterday. If that was my only jersey I'd go to a t-shirt outlet store and buy a cheap all red shirt.
[Reply]
Chiefspants 10:04 PM 11-02-2012
Originally Posted by Tribal Warfare:


Holy fuck, Cassel never makes a mistake but everyone on the team does.
Lol, if you want a complete and utter contrast you should watch Rivers' postgame, the INT is one of the first things he talks about and he admitted that it was a HORRIBLE mistake.
[Reply]
Priest31kc 10:39 PM 11-02-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
And this is why we must be ever vigilant. Never surrender.
WHAT!?

Just incredible.
[Reply]
Pants 10:59 PM 11-02-2012
Originally Posted by Tribal Warfare:


Holy fuck, Cassel never makes a mistake but everyone on the team does.
:-)
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 02:43 AM 11-03-2012
Is he say "Fustrated?"

Is this the shit QB version of Herm's "Flustrated?"

Matt Cassel - never wanting to own that L.
[Reply]
007 03:07 AM 11-03-2012
Is the only time he says "i" when he refers to how he grades out?
[Reply]
bevischief 06:32 AM 11-03-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Just saw an awesome stat on PFF.

Cassel is ranked DEAD LAST in quarterback rating on play action passes.
No shit.
[Reply]
bevischief 06:35 AM 11-03-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
And this is why we must be ever vigilant. Never surrender.
That's another reason to fire Peeholi.
[Reply]
bevischief 06:38 AM 11-03-2012
This thread should be enough to fire Peeholi.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 03:47 PM 11-03-2012


Profane version here!

http://i.imgur.com/sbAfX.jpg
[Reply]
Dayze 08:59 AM 11-04-2012
At the very basic level of Pioli's performance, he should be skewered for
1. Failing so miserably in his evaluation of the most critical position on the field
2. Sticking withi said failure for nearly an entire season or more.

To me, that's why he should be fired. His first move was such a collossal failure he doesn't deserve to stick around. It wasn't as if Cassel was a very your pup and was having growing pains of an average young QB. Cassel has been so atrocious, with zero upside and was Evident two years ago.

If the chiefs are in a position to draft a franchise QB, in no way do I want Pioli in the evaluation room of the qb. If he can't get it right with a guy he's seen everyday in practice on NE there's no way he can get it right with a pro prospect from college.

Not to mention the 100 other reasons he should be fired.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 07:16 PM 11-06-2012

[Reply]
Dayze 07:50 PM 11-06-2012
If you look closely at his play calling list, all pass plays call for an Omaha check with me. Which, unbeknownst to Cassel.......are the same plays. But the coaches let home think he's doing something.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 08:06 PM 11-06-2012
FRESH Cassel GIFs. So good.





[Reply]
bowener 08:16 PM 11-06-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Graded out perfectly.
[Reply]
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